w45: 4-10 November

A Land (charity shop paperback), Laocoon’s Children Year One: The Philosopher’s Stone (Stealing Harryverse, #2) (ao3, read on Kindle), Mary Barton (Gutenberg, read on Kindle), Mrs. Ames (Gutenberg, read on Kindle)

Monday phoned in sick with the intention of spending the day on my sofa with crochet and ebooks and spotify’s Sleep playlist. the Big Spoon went out for max strength cold remedy capsules.

The Go-Between (library ebook), The Old and the New Magic (Gutenberg, read on Kindle), Wives and Daughters (Kindle)

Tuesday back at ‘work’ – some cleaning, some digging, some leaf-raking. The big beech is still dropping leaves (prettily) so raking is a long term thing. Afternoon mostly scrolling, coffee, scrolling, coffee…

Two new notebooks on society6 out of autumn leaves photos from the last few days.

Dog woke me by wandering thoughtfully across my face at 5am Wednesday, so she and I got up and moved to the sofa, where she became a croissant and fell back asleep. Did I use this time to write for Nanowrimo? did I heck, I opened Reddit.

The Wonderful Year (Gutenberg on Kindle), The Light Between Worlds (library ebook), The Hidden World of the Fox (library ebook)

Wednesday afternoon I worked the two hours I missed on Monday, raking leaves and trying to level the veg bed we used for courgettes. If it’s soon dry enough to get the ride-on mower out, that will pick up and shred the leaves. Thursday at work was all indoor things: kitchen, a dab of paint on the wooden side door (trying not to be noticed by the professional painter who’s doing the window frames and would undoubtedly have tutted at my overarm methods), wandering around with the cordless vac.

society6 had a 20% day (they have them quite often) so I ordered the notebook I listed with Priscilla’s sleepy face on, telling myself that £8.72 is less than a new moleskine and it’s a good idea to get a demo model so I can recommend them in good faith. That’s all justification; I just wanted a cute new notebook.

Friday was indoor work as well – a conversation about the workshed led to going through boxes of That’ll Come In Handy in search of things to either throw away or attempt at a car boot sale. They’re very aware that it’ll all have to be sold off eventually, and it may as well be while they’re still around to feel glee about the money. I do need to be very clear about recording what I take away from work. So far it’s old tools and winemaking glassware, but I wouldn’t want their sons thinking even for a moment that I was making off with the silver spoons.

Friday evening I told both my group chats that I think my winter thing is coming back. I might be wrong, it might just be the remnants of the cold I had last weekend. I don’t feel hopeless, or anhedonic, or such in the way I remember from other winters. I do feel very, very tired. I’m watching Priscilla play with her best bouncy ball right now and I know she’s protecting me from the grinding bleakness of real depression, but I am not my whole self this week.

I did get my lightbox out of the cupboard, finally, two weeks after nagging my mother (who also has seasonal depression) to get hers out.

The Family Medici: The Hidden History of the Medici Dynasty (library ebook), The Innocent (library ebook, terrible), The Forager’s Calendar: A Seasonal Guide to Nature’s Wild Harvests (library ebook)

Saturday I took the puppy with me to work, where she brought great joy to the humans and annoyance to the cat. Then we went up to visit the Healer and their dogs, where I learned that the Tank is doing better at nanowrimo than I am even though he’s super busy and gets caught up in comparing The Hundred Best Technical Solutions For Writing Your Novel just as much as I do. The thing is, I’m ‘only’ about 8k words behind. People do do that. I’m pretty sure I’ve done it? Put hands on keyboard, mash words.